Poseidon Reigns This Saturday!
By Bert Sanders
After all the hoopla, shenanigans, controversies, and malarkey, the 11th annual Poseidon’s Parade is all set to kick off on Saturday, September 27 at 1 p.m. sharp! The Rockaway Mermaid Brigade has once again put together, what is set to be, another incredible day of art, creativity, freaks, geeks, Greeks, and family fun for all. The aquatic stroll along the boardwalk, which serves as the official end to the Rockaway summer season, is shaping up to be one for the ages.
After my in-depth coverage of the court packing scandal, it has been impossible to reach Queen Casey. I instead checked in with Geoff Rawling “El Capitan,” himself for the pertinent details. He has been seen crashing Sunday Sauces, while taking up temporary residence in Poseidon’s Cave, as he works tirelessly to repair his mobile “Whaleamina” with “Edhead the Deadhead.” He is happy to report that Rockaway’s favorite whale will be ready in time for the parade. “I don’t think the Queen wants me to speak with you, Bert, but she seems confident that this year will go off without a hitch,” muttered a cranky Geoff while sipping a scolding hot Barry’s tea and watching “Arsenal” on his tablet.
This year, the parade route will return to its pre-pandemic form. The lineup will be at Beach 106th Street in front of Caracas, where marchers are encouraged to arrive at high noon. The judges, all seven of them, will return to their original perch on Beach 96th Street. The lifeguard chairs will be placed right past the 97th concessions, where the judges can sharply critique the sea creature strut before the parade ends at The Rockaway Amphitheater. The all-lifeguard judging panel will consider if they received the bribes necessary to select winners.
The judging categories are as follows: Best Pet, Best Pub/ Restaurant, Best Push/Pull Cart or Wagon, Best Adult Group – “Kristine Caruso Award,” Best Bike, Best Children’s Group, Best Individual – “Ms. Colombia Award,” Best Block, Best Float, Best Overall, and Best Performance. The winners of each category will earn a homemade trophy, as is tradition.
The awards will be announced at the Amphitheater after the judges are completely deliberated and inebriated.
In the meantime, the Rockaway Mermaid Brigade is excited to announce a special performance by “Merman,” a mermaid themed band that is sure to dazzle and delight. They will be followed by DJ Kay-Kay who will keep us rocking into the evening. Ste”fun”ie will be providing face paint for the youngsters, while the ZenTora Chess Club will have a chess table set up for demonstrations, lessons, and competitions. The awards ceremony always includes a dance from the best dancing ladies in NYC, “The Tailshakers!”
If you have not yet registered, it is not too late. You can register at poseidonsparade.com. While it is not encouraged, no one will be turned away from day of registration. There will also be a limited number of t-shirts available. Swing by Poseidon’s Cave to grab one before the big day. Special thanks to St. James for getting these powder blue shirts printed! To donate to the parade, you can Zelle poseidonsparade@gmail.com. (Poseidon’s Parade Inc, is an official 501-c3 nonprofit). Most importantly, be sure to grab a good spot on the boardwalk to catch the madness!
