Poseidon’s Prom Set for February 3

By Bert Sanders

As the winter kicks into gear, it is important for the revelers of the Rockaway community to take full advantage of the downtime. These cold, dark days are a time for summer loving beach folk to relax, rejuvenate, reinvent, recharge, and revitalize. For the Rockaway Mermaid Brigade, it is time to reorganize, and replace the funds that were spectacularly squandered on the seaside summer ending stroll known as Poseidon’s Parade. In other words, it is time for Poseidon’s Prom.

Poseidon’s Prom is the yearly fundraiser that helps cover the expenses of the famous parade. The Brigade needs to cover the cost of face painters, Whalemina repairs, generators, permits, brokers, promotions, decorations, DJ’s, musicians, dancers, prancers, artists, MCs, trophy materials and of course, the cooler for the judges. More importantly, the yearly nautical prom is the Brigade’s way of bringing artistic summer energy back to Rockaway on an otherwise cold dreary night.

There is only one place that can truly muster up summer energy in the dead of winter. This year, for the first time in Brigade history, the prom will take place at Connolly’s Pub! On February 3 at 7 p.m, Connolly’s on Beach 95th Street will be opening its doors for the 7th Annual Poseidon’s Prom. The Brigade looks to transform Connolly’s into an underwater Caribbean dance hall that would make Sebastian the crab shed his exoskeleton.

I reached out to DJ Paddy Tubz, who will be DJing the prom for the seventh time. His agent answered the phone and organized a zoom conference. Several hours later, Paddy’s smiling face was on my computer. I had many questions about the prom, his DJ philosophy, and his favorite part of Poseidon’s Parade. Despite the variety of questions, all of his answers somehow related back to a place he called “Gamehenge,” and his epic New Year’s Eve at YEMSG. I have no idea what he was going on about, but I know from experience covering the Rockaway Party Scene, that he will be lively and well for the yearly ball.

Paddy will be sharing entertaining duties with Bettina, who will bring her brazen and bizarre brand of insanity to the event. In addition to her work as a comedy host, she has been spending much of her winter on hiatus, studying extrasolar planetary bodies, in search of a new home for mankind. I asked her about the event and she replied, “Johnny and I have been focusing our energy on GJ 504b, a pink gassy planet that is four times more massive than Jupiter.” I look forward to whatever is coming from her cranium on February 3.

As always, the festivities will peak with the awarding of the prom king and queen, who will ceremoniously lead the 2024 Poseidon’s Prom (which looks to fall on September 21, 2024). This honor can only be outdone with the awarding of the infamously phallic Poseidon trophy that goes to a person of honor each year.

In addition to the crownings, the winner of the big 50/50, and other fantastic prizes will be drawn at the party. The Brigade is selling 100 $50 50/50 boxes in advance of the event. There are still some boxes available. The Brigade takes cash and Zelle, and you can contact 347-234-2087 if you are interested in a box.  I broke bread with Jerry Rea, Rockaway’s favorite used car salesman who figured out that you can earn 5000% on your initial $50 investment if your box hits on the big day. “Imagine earning 5,000% on something? That’s wild. That’s what you should be telling people!” He shouted as he wiped a glob of meat sauce off his shirt.

The Brigade once again thanks The Rockaway Times for all of its support throughout the years! Feel free to reach out to the Brigade with donations, creations, ideas, or adorations. You can Zelle poseidonsparade@gmail.com if you would like to donate to the parade fund.

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