A Freezing Cold Take

By Sean McVeigh

Monday kicked off a three-day stretch of absolute scorchers. And while I know it borders on sacrilege to say this in late July, I was feeling a little … beached out. So, in search of a heat-beating alternative, I did what any self-respecting Marvel Comics nerd would do: I went to see the latest iteration of “The Fantastic Four” by myself in the theaters.

I went solo because my wife had “other things to do.” I’m not (completely) naïve — I know she just didn’t want to see it. She did a good job of playing it off, too. She even pretended to be jealous that I was headed to a nice, cold movie theater while she was out gallivanting in the heat. Sadly, that wasn’t the case. Turns out, $34 doesn’t even guarantee air conditioning these days. The place was certainly not cool and that, mixed with the surprisingly nice leather chairs, was a poor combination.

Not to sound entitled but come on — air conditioning in a movie theater isn’t a luxury, it’s the bare minimum. Maybe that’s some of this “privilege” I hear about so much lately, but I’ve always thought of A/C as a given. I was recently enlightened, through several different articles, that this is not the case in much of Europe.

I have spent a little time across the pond and, to be honest, while I find a lack of A/C extremely disconcerting, I am not surprised. American norms often qualify as luxuries over there. Do you like ice in your drink? Me too. Ask for that in Europe and you’ll get some funny looks followed by one single ice cube. When I was in Ireland for an extended period of time, in order to get hot water in my shower, I had to turn on the electric hot water heater attached to my shower. Unsurprisingly, this was not the promptest method of establishing a hot shower in the morning.

A recent article in “The Wall Street Journal” — “The New Hot Topic in European Politics Is Air Conditioning,” by Matthew Dalton — helped explain the European perspective. The gist? Many Europeans view air conditioning as an American indulgence. In fact, cooling temperatures down too much has some across the Atlantic worried. “The prospect of U.S.-style air conditioning sends shivers through some Europeans,” writes Dalton. “In France, media outlets often warn that cooling a room to more than 15 degrees Fahrenheit below the outside temperature can cause something called ‘thermal shock,’ resulting in nausea, loss of consciousness and even respiratory arrest,” Dalton says in his piece for the WSJ.

Someone should probably give a heads-up to our friends in Phoenix, Las Vegas, and San Antonio, who all hit triple-digit highs this past week. It must have been some scene, watching everyone vomiting and losing consciousness every time they walked in and out of their homes, their cars, a grocery store, etc.

Even here in New York, we’ve got our own A/C absurdities. There are still schools — schools, you know, with young children — without air conditioning. You try reading Shakespeare in June or September without A/C. The late spring and early fall months can be brutal. My wife, who grew up in Arizona, can’t comprehend it. There is no such thing as a building in Arizona without A/C. It probably won’t be long before there is air conditioning on the streets out there — and honestly, if I lived there, that’s the sort of thing I’d be voting for.

Meanwhile, in Europe, governments are doubling down on the no A/C lifestyle. Dalton writes that in London, “construction firms must consider cooling design features before including air conditioning in new buildings.” A Conservative MP even recently called for an end to “the ridiculous restrictions on air-conditioning units in new builds in London.”

So basically, air conditioning is something you can consider — but only after exhausting all other “green” alternatives.

Well, good luck with that, Londoners — who have already experienced three official heat waves this summer.

Honestly, I don’t know what you’d have to pay me to live in a place without A/C. You could probably quadruple my salary and I’d still turn it down. It would be torture. I imagine there would be rioting in the streets if anyone tried to take away people’s precious air conditioning.

Thankfully, I don’t think it’ll come to that here. Say what you will about the U.S. — and believe me, I’ve got some things to say — but at least we don’t consider being comfortable a luxury. Once again, America proves itself superior to just about any other place in the world.

Just out of curiosity, I looked up ticket prices for “Fantastic Four: First Steps” — or “Les 4 Fantastiques: Premiers Pas” — in Paris. A seat will run you €25, or about $29. So if you’re looking to watch a great movie in a sweltering theater, you’re better off going to Paris and saving yourself five bucks.