Moderation: Finding The Balance

By Jennifer Kelleher

This week, I am curious to contemplate the idea of moderation. I have always had a very extreme personality, and living moderately was not something that came so naturally for me. My mindset was (and still is with some things, but I’m working on it): Go hard or go home; all or nothing.

Over time and through experience, I found that my extreme ways were not quite serving me. Inevitably, they would throw me off balance, which would prompt me to reel it in and go extreme in the other direction. Growing tired of this game of ping pong, I thought, “There has to be a better way. What is wrong with me? Why can’t I just be more moderate?”

These questions sent me on a journey. After a lot of trial and error, I learned helpful practices for keeping me calm and stable. Yoga and meditation, for example, have been huge in helping me to stay grounded, present, aware, and non-reactive. I also realized that the fire in me is not necessarily bad, and what I had to do was learn how to channel it productively. Finally, surrounding myself with the right people has definitely been beneficial.

For me, achieving any type of moderation comes from setting structure for myself. For example, I used to have zero structure around eating. In the past, I would start my day with black coffee and use that to fuel me for as long as possible. Eventually, I would get hungry around 3 or 4 p.m. and have a little something. Then, I would eat dinner– whatever was around. Fast forward to today, I prioritize three protein dense, low sugar meals at proper mealtimes, with a healthy snack in between if necessary. Some other things that help me stay structured are my yoga practice, going to the gym, my work (which is also a deep passion), my son, and getting to bed before 10 p.m. Keeping these non-negotiables in place the majority of the time helps me to remain on track, balanced, and healthy.

That being said, I have found that while structure is very important for me, I also need some moderation with it. I need times when I can metaphorically color outside the lines. That can look like trying something new, having carefree fun, going on a little adventure– anything to mix it up, lighten the mood, and change pace a little.

Also, I find it easier to practice moderation when I have variety. Eating the same thing every day can become mundane. Doing the same one or two things to relax every evening or weekend can become stale. Giving ourselves more variety helps us to experience things from a newer perspective. It helps to keep us present, aware, and engaged in what we are doing because it’s different and interesting. Variety can bring color and excitement to our lives.

Furthermore, feeling a sense of fulfillment throughout the various areas of life plays a role in keeping us moderate. If an area of life is lacking, it is natural to try to make up for that in some other way. For example, if you’re not happy with your work life, you might find yourself binge drinking on the weekends. Instead of doing something to try to momentarily escape the thing you’re frustrated with, what if you actively tried to feed that area that feels empty or lusterless? Remember, you are a co-creator of your life, and you are never stuck. Change happens when you decide to make it happen. Baby steps each day can foster great progress.

There is a lot more to say on this topic, but due to space constraints I will cut it here. Join me for yoga and Pilates at Ocean Bliss Yoga– sign up at oceanblissyoga.net. Our 200-Hour Yoga Teacher Training starts on February 21. Enrollment is open. Call me at 917-318-1168 for further details.