Seeing is Believing
By Sean McVeigh
UFOs are about as American as apple pie. Our fascination with the subject is undeniable. How many TV shows are there now fully devoted to UFOs? The History Channel alone could probably rebrand as “The UFO Channel” and not lose a step. Imagine Giorgio Tsoukalos (IYKYK) at the helm, running wild with programming. It sounds like a moneymaker to me. Personally, I’m a believer — I think intelligent life exists out there somewhere. I just don’t believe it’s here.
What has always bothered me about most UFO stories is the location. Picture this: You’re watching the History Channel, and they cut to an interview with a stereotypical middle-American farmer. He might as well be wearing overalls with a piece of straw between his lips. He recounts a gripping tale about walking down a dirt road in his one-traffic-light town when — bam — he sees something out of this world.
Give me a break. You’re telling me these intergalactic travelers are so advanced that they’ve managed to journey lightyears to get here, and their big move is to take some notes on Valentine, Nebraska? Really? If aliens were observing us, I think they’d aim for Times Square, the South Lawn of the White House, or maybe Tokyo or Prague. I find it hard to believe that they’d be taking a strong interest in Nowheresville, USA.
When I first heard about all the drone sightings in New Jersey a few weeks ago, I thought maybe we were finally onto something. I’m certainly not claiming that these aliens would have an interest in New Jersey — this is intelligent life we are talking about, after all. The lights from New York were just too bright, so perhaps these aliens had taken a step back to observe from a safe distance. But, to my extreme disappointment, the story never even leaned toward extraterrestrial intrigue. From the start, most people seemed pretty sure they were just human-made drones. The question wasn’t “What are they?” but “Who’s flying them, and why?”
The other night, while out flaneuring with my dog — as we’re wont to do — I saw it. Hovering above us, what seemed like just a few hundred feet away, was a drone. It was unmistakable: flashing green and red lights and the distinct body of those flying spying eyes. For about two blocks, we walked, gawking at this mysterious snooper. All I could think was: “By George, the kooks were right. There really is something going on here.”
A few more paces, another glance up — still there, still following us. What could this cyber spook possibly want? Then I heard it. A sound Rockaway residents have grown almost immune to: Whrrrrrrr-oooooom! That unmistakable sound of a plane. Turns out, my “drone” was just a commercial flight coming or going from JFK. One of the dozens that fly over Rockaway every day. And, for that matter, over New Jersey Lord knows how many times daily.
Though it might not always be glaringly evident in these columns, I am an eternal optimist. I tend to look on the bright side rather than the nefarious side of things, sometimes to a fault. When I first heard of “drone-gate,” my initial thought was that it was just a bunch of jackasses being jackasses. Someone flies a drone at night, word spreads, a few more people start flying their drones and suddenly everyone’s seeing drones everywhere. That’s how these things snowball.
Occam’s razor says the simplest answer is often the best. My guess? Tell people there are drones in the sky at night, and suddenly, every plane, star, or flashing light starts to look like one.
To be clear, I have no evidence to support my theory. I haven’t even set foot in New Jersey since this whole thing started (thank God). There are, of course, other theories. Some suggest a lost nuclear bomb is being searched for by government drones under cover of night. Others claim it’s a new drone technology test conducted in one of the most populated regions of the country — and they kept testing even after being noticed. And who am I to dismiss the possibility of foreign drones invading our airspace, evading the notice of a defense budget north of $800 billion?
Who knows? Maybe new evidence will surface, and one of these theories will turn out to be true. Maybe I’ll end up looking like a fool. It’s possible. But I’m pretty optimistic it’s not going to happen. For now, all I know is that the truth is out there … hovering over Jersey, having a good laugh at us.
