Stressed out Sally

 Stressed out Sally

By By Shane Kulman

Dear Enchantress,

I don’t want to “lose” myself. I want to continue to love myself, and it’s hard with all the stress of the world, and all the hatred I see on social media, which I feel. I don’t live in the city, but I spend time there, and it’s hard to watch angry people doing things that are not kind. Ugh, how do I live in these stressful times and NOT go crazy or lose my mind?

Stressed out Sally


Dear Stressed out Sally,

I understand that life can often throw us into a whirlwind of stress and chaos, making it feel almost impossible to hold on to our authenticity. But here’s the good news: even in the midst of turmoil, authenticity can be your guiding light, and your ally. Here are some clear ways to go about life, and not “lose your mind.”

Bring in your highest self-awareness: Begin by understanding and acknowledging your feelings. Stress can manifest in many forms, from anxiety to frustration, to exhaustion. Take time to reflect on how stress affects you personally. When you’re aware of your emotions, you can respond to them more authentically. It’s a time to REALLY learn more about yourself.

Next, it’s really a time to accept your vulnerability.  It might make your skin crawl, but remember, authenticity is not about being superhuman. It’s about being real. Embrace your vulnerability and accept that it’s okay not to have all the answers or to be in control all the time. Vulnerability is the birthplace of authenticity.  Really remind yourself of that, and you can write it on a post it and hang it up.

If you don’t have one already, find a place, a person or a small group where it’s ok to share your feelings.  It can also be a journal, if you don’t have anyone.  Authenticity often involves sharing your feelings with those you trust. Opening up about your stress can be incredibly liberating and can help you feel understood and supported.

Set personal boundaries: When stress is at its all-time high, it’s crucial to set personal boundaries. Learn to say “no” to doom scrolling. Notice when you see an image or something on social media and your heart begins to race. Immediately shut it down and move your body. When a random person or a friend begins a stressful conversation, give yourself permission to ask “can we talk about this another time? Right now, I’m maxed out on stress.”

UP UP UP and prioritize self-care: Taking care of yourself is a powerful way to remain authentic. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation, whether it’s meditation, exercise, reading, or simply taking a quiet moment for yourself. Hiring someone to take good care of you or asking for someone to do that is like medicine.

Lastly, seek professional help if needed. Remember that it’s perfectly authentic to seek professional help when the stress becomes overwhelming. A therapist or counselor can provide you with tools to manage stress and maintain your authenticity and feel out if it’s a good fit.  Not every professional is a good fit for you.

In the midst of chaos and stress, authenticity can be a source of strength and resilience. It’s about being honest with yourself, embracing your vulnerability, and seeking the support you need. Authenticity is not about being perfect; it’s about being real and true to yourself, even when life gets tough.

Wishing you a journey of authenticity and inner strength,

Enchantress Shane

If you are wanting to ask Shane a question, or work with her, email her at


Related post

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *